In every relationship be it with your spouse, fiance, whether you are just starting out as boyfriend and girlfriend, steady or going to be newly weds, to have a healthy relationship, we need to continually learn about ourselves and how to interact with others. When we are in a relationship, believe or not, success or failure of the relationship has the greatest impact on our adult life. In looking at marriage, there are a number of key skills that are crucial to navigating our way through marriage: There will always be couples who live in apparent wedded bliss, and those that will tell you that they never fight or disagree. That simply isn’t true. As each of us grow and evolve, one of the exciting things about marriages is the way we interact and negotiate our way around issues when we look at things from different perspectives. Those who tell you they have never been challenged in this way have never really lived. But what determines whether this challenge is a positive or negative experience for your marriage is how both of you choose to react to your differences and work around them. When faced with a disagreement there are a range of choices. The first is to back down, allowing the other to make their point and express it. Another is to challenge their point and ascertain whether it is correct. Another choice is to discuss both options and see if there is room for flexibility. Are both of you correct, or is one of you incorrect in your viewpoint? How much is one person’s viewpoint inhibiting the beliefs, values, or morals of the other? The most important point here however, is introspection. Evaluate your actions and reactions. * What lesson am I being called to learn in this conflict? The key is to understand the issues and to find small ways to move forward. You can call them goals. Make them achievable, and make them measurable. How often are you coming back and seeing if you have reached your goals? Are you making progress or are you at a stalemate? The important thing to realize is that you are always learning, and finding new ways of understanding and loving each other as well as yourselves. Think of your marriage issues as an opportunity for growth and understanding. In marriage we are called into a constant evolution, a journey of loving. The challenge to all marriages, good and bad, is to find new ways of loving each other. If you have been married one year, ten years or forty years, the challenge is still the same. Grow in love together. What can you learn from your partner and your marriage today? What do you know today that you didn’t know yesterday. The secret is to never stop learning. And when you do stop learning, that’s where we can help.   You may be making mistakes that will jeopardize your marriage recovery!
CLICK HERE to check out Check Out Save My Marriage Today! Premium Home Study Course which has helped fastrack the turnaround of thousands of marriages and is guaranteed to deliver you real and measurable results or your money back! You are the best person to save your marriage, and with the tools and techniques in my Premium Home Study Course you really can. You have to learn what it takes to save your marriage. Get the whole package that gives you REAL answers and REAL results … guaranteed. CLICK HERE to go to get your Save My Marriage Today Premium Home Study Course Today! Because the key to your marriage success is in your hands!  |
Archive for ◊ January, 2009 ◊
If you’ve had a lot emotionally invested into a relationship and it ends, it’s something that can potentially make you feel sad for years. Maybe even for the rest of your life. But, braze yourself and understand that it doesn’t mean that the sadness has to paralyze your life and throw you into depression. Try getting over the person. It’s hard at this time but you need to occupy your mind with other things, new things that you were interested in before you had your relationship. After a period of time after the loss, you should have come out of it…. and overcome your heartache and sadness. It’s going to hurt, no matter what you do. But there are some things you can do to lessen the pain. You can remove obvious visual reminders of the person, if possible. Photographs of your relationship should be put away for a while. Gifts he or she gave you should be stored away instead of being displayed. You can even avoid the places you used to go together for a while. This tip can be found in pretty much every list that explains how to get over someone you love, so it’s at least a popular idea that’s worth a try. If you’re really having trouble living your life after the break up, it might be necessary to seek counseling. Simply explain that you’ve just been through a painful break up and ask the counselor how to get over someone you love. They can offer helpful advice, and can be more specific that generic lists about how to get over someone you love. A counselor can also probably offer better advice than friends or family. Your friends and family might feel they know your situation too well. Some may have motives for help you get over the person. They might not have liked that you were in the relationship to begin with, so they might want you to get over things or move on to another person too quickly. With a counselor, though, you can safely tell them things about the relationship you probably don’t want friends or family to even know. There are several counseling hotline for the distraught in relationships… if you need to call. Or, confide in your mom or dad or even sister or brother. Grieve if you must but don’t spending too much time dwelling on how to get over someone you love.
Very few people choose to take action on something when they don’t act on it right away. With that in mind, if you don’t take action right now, will you be in the relationship of your dreams 6 months from now? A year? Will you truly grow from this experience, or will it haunt you in the future? Sign up for my RSS feed by clicking on this link here: Subscribe to Just Get My Ex Back by Email or download your FREE ebook here: Download Personality Quadrants Dating Guide Now |
You might say, “I’m still in love, but my ex isn’t.” This is a difficult situation. First of all, you do not really need to know that your ex is not still in love with you. Your ex may claim to not love you anymore, and that is possible. But, it is still possible that he or she still harbors feelings for you. Many couples may still be deeply in love even after a break up possibly for other reasons. So, why is she seeing another guy? Well, the answer is simple. You have broken up… and for a reason. Even if you didn’t want to break up and the break off was entirely your ex’s doing, really think hard about things. I know you still care about your ex; about his or her well-being, but she doesn’t need to report to you now, since you both broke up. If you think hard enough, you would recall why you broke up and you will know the break up may be for the better… for now. I’m not saying that there is no hope of getting back together again. No, it just that at this time, it could be better… for now. Are you still in love with your ex? If so, there is a good chance that your ex might still be in love with you. But, it does not necessarily mean it is a good idea to try to get back together now. With time you will either see that you STILL love enough to want her back or see that the break up might even be good for you. Take some time for yourself. If the break up is mutual, now may be a very hard time for you because you still feel “I’m still in love with my ex” or “she should be with me”. Could you take this time now… to love your ex from afar and work through the sadness rather than try to rekindle the romance? “I’m still in love; my ex even wants to get back together.” While this might make you feel very hopeful that the two of you might be able to work things out and live happily ever after, don’t be fooled into thinking that it will be easy. The reasons you broke up are still there. If you get back together, what will change? Will your relationship go along well for a while because you’re both so happy to be back together or go back to the usual dissatisfaction later? Do you have a 2nd Chance with your ex? If you broke up thinking, I’m still in love my ex, and he or she thought the same… there is a high chance to get back your ex back and get back together. But, there is a worry here is that after you go through a period where both of you felt you saved the relationship, the feel good period will wear off eventually, and reality sets in where your differences start to rub to strain the relationship again. Then what will you do? My sincere advice then for you both is to seek counseling. Couples counseling is a good option to help both of you to prevent the problems that caused you to break up in the first place from coming back and making you want to part ways again. If you think, “I’m still in love my ex and want him or her back,” then consider counseling to keep old problems from splitting you up again later. If you feel you need that further guidance, I would recommend you browse through some of the recommended guides like this on:
Have you broken up with a loved one and want to do anything to win back their love? Crying? Begging? Pleading? Threatening? All to get your ex to give you another chance? If you aren’t sure WHAT is the best approach to take to give yourself the best possible chance of success at getting back together, then you need to put an end to the guesswork and get the real answers. Mirabelle and Amy have just developed a 6-step program that GUARANTEES Relationship Rescue Success! by Mirabelle Summers & Amy Waterman Sign up for my RSS feed by clicking on this link here: Subscribe to Just Get My Ex Back by Email or download your FREE ebook here: Download Personality Quadrants Dating Guide Now |
Warning Sign #1: Abuse Run for your life if you find that you are dealing with psychological abuse, especially if you think it’s deliberate and not just the result of ignorance or insensitivity. Forget about your ex if he or she gives you constant criticism, guilt trips, bullying, double messages or even teasing. If you are always preparing for a defense, waiting for an attack, it can be very exhausting emotionally and will affect your self-esteem big time. We become susceptible to depression, sleeplessness and irritability. If your ex makes you feel helpless or hopeless of your future all the time, just leave him… give him up. Run even faster if your ex had been abusive physically. Don’t think it is your fault. One in every three women is assaulted by her partner. Two of every three women who are physically abused after marriage had been abused while they were still dating. Remember if you experience verbal put-downs followed by condescending and annoyed insults; which leads to threats of physical violence, you ex is NOT WORTH IT. Leave now. Don’t let yourself believe that his good education or a wealthy family background makes you safe. Us your intuition, and self-protective instincts. Warning Sign #2: Jealousy Forget about the old fashion jeaslousy love that you need to be jealous to be wildly in love. But, let’s face it… LOVE IS NOT JEALOUS. It might feel flattering at first, but great jealousy is always a great problem. If your ex is jealous about you being with your friends, acquaintances or even family, eventually your life will start to diminish and not enhanced. A jealous lover is an angry lover. If you think you can make him or her secure enough that your partner’s jealousy will subside, think again. Extreme jealousy, makes the other partner feel insecure, and it’s lethal for love. Warning Sign #3: Unfaithfulness Forget about your ex if he or she had been unfaithful to you. In fact, think twice if he is being unfaithful to someone else when he was with you, or if he was unfaifhful to his previous partner – even if she forgave him! You may forgive… but you may never forget. Stop blaming yourself if he cheated. It’s not you, it’s definitely him. The number one reason that faithful men do not cheat isn’t because it is greater love, but it is greater commitment and it is because “they promised”. Ninety percent of American men say they believe affairs “are always or almost always wrong.” Yet one in four do it anyway. Look for one of the other three! Warning Sign #4: Liars If your ex lies to you, just forget about him or her. Sometimes it’s white lies to make others feel good (ie. thanks I love the sweater) or to make you feel good (ie. I’m a sensitive kind of guy). If he tells big lies to get himself out of trouble or to manipulate… you have to be very careful. Habitual liars typically know right from wrong – but they do not particularly care. Learn how to spot liars… it’s not easy. Be alert and if you feel that you partner seems to good to be true, probably he is. Warning Sign #5: (Perpetually) Unemployed or needy If your ex is a bump and gets fired from his job again and again. It’s not about the money… but it’s about playing well with others. Probably he is having some bad luck. Of course, but could he be unappreciated time and again. And, most of the time, he’s probably depressed, low in self-esteem and full of anger. I guess you could stick with him but you don’t really need a needy person you know. What I’m saying here is if you know your ex is needing help, money, support, encouragement ALL THE TIME, he or she is sucking your life away. He is too self-centered to be in a relationship in the first place. So… say your goodbyes and run. —————————————– These are the signs which when you see them, do remember what you have read here… No need to cry for your ex back. He or she is not worth it if they fall in any of these categories. This article was brought to you by Just Get My Ex Back If you like what you read, sign up for my RSS feed by clicking on this link here: Subscribe to Just Get My Ex Back by Email or download your FREE ebook here: Download Personality Quadrants Dating Guide Now
by Mirabelle Summers
|
